Diary 1993. Extract 3.

19 January 1993.

Dear D,
Dad picked Joe and me up from Manchester airport at midnight and we got home at 4am. I am shattered.

Mum has told dad about my eating and dad handled it in his usual clumsy way. He asked me what about what I was doing to my mum!

Mum had booked an appointment with the doctor. She was crying in the doctors. The doctor has said that I have to see a psychiatrist. I don’t really know how I feel about this. I have to go back to the doctors every week to be weighed.

Joe is telling his mum about my eating now and I am sure she’ll turn him against me.

I hate that everyone is talking about me.

I came back to four unconditional university places and I have to make a decision. I don’t even think that I want to go.

I can’t cope.
X